Posted by: Shar & Mare | December 12, 2012

Do Opposites Ever Really Attract?


We’re off for a short vacation this week! In the meantime, here’s a guest post for this week…enjoy!

do_opposites_attractIf there’s one dating cliche we’ve all heard before, it’s the notion that ‘opposites attract’. This age-old dating idea is one that has fueled many a Hollywood romance script, not to mention the odd Broadway musical. But the real question is: just how realistic is it?

When it comes to creating a happy, healthy relationship, just how important are shared interests in things like music, food and holidays? For anyone pondering just what it is that makes a couple truly click, here’s a look at whether relationships can work between two very different people…

Where did we get the idea?

If you ask the average singleton whether different people and personalities can form one cohesive relationship, you usually receive a confident answer: yes.

Thanks to the world of fiction played out on the silver screen, there’s an ingrained idea that romance is born from clashing personalities. In fact, it’s often the most irritating people who will catch your eye and create that spark of attraction. But is there really any truth to it? To answer this, we need to gain an understanding of exactly what components make up a successful relationship.

Similar interests

Shared interests can certainly help to form a spark of attraction and bring two people together in a relationship. If you think of some of the happy couples you know, chances are some of them have a charming anecdote about how their shared interests brought them together. It might have been a passion for fine dining, a love of sailing, or perhaps a keen interest in Latin dance.

Hobbies help to introduce us to a like-minded circle of people, increasing the likelihood of starting a romance with someone who has similar interests.

So shared interests are common in couples, but are they imperative? The answer is, in fact, no. While similar interests might help bring a couple together, they certainly aren’t the key ingredients for keeping them together long term.

Compatibility

Love isn’t just about shared hobbies. If you find yourself in a relationship with a rock fan, yet you prefer pop, there’s plenty of hope for you yet. That’s because long-term relationships are actually built on compatibility.

Compatibility is about finding harmony and like-minded attitudes between two people. This can mean everything from your core values to the way you resolve conflict. For religious people, this could mean finding people who share your approach to faith, like finding other Jewish singles.

Where did we get the idea?

If you ask the average singleton whether different people and personalities can form one cohesive relationship, you usually receive a confident answer: yes.

Thanks to the world of fiction played out on the silver screen, there’s an ingrained idea that romance is born from clashing personalities. In fact, it’s often the most irritating people who will catch your eye and create that spark of attraction. But is there really any truth to it? To answer this, we need to gain an understanding of exactly what components make up a successful relationship.

Similar interests

Shared interests can certainly help to form a spark of attraction and bring two people together in a relationship. If you think of some of the happy couples you know, chances are some of them have a charming anecdote about how their shared interests brought them together. It might have been a passion for fine dining, a love of sailing, or perhaps a keen interest in Latin dance.

Hobbies help to introduce us to a like-minded circle of people, increasing the likelihood of starting a romance with someone who has similar interests.

So shared interests are common in couples, but are they imperative? The answer is, in fact, no. While similar interests might help bring a couple together, they certainly aren’t the key ingredients for keeping them together long term.

Compatibility

Love isn’t just about shared hobbies. If you find yourself in a relationship with a rock fan, yet you prefer pop, there’s plenty of hope for you yet. That’s because long-term relationships are actually built on compatibility.

Compatibility is about finding harmony and like-minded attitudes between two people. This can mean everything from your core values to the way you resolve conflict. For religious people, this could mean finding people who share your approach to faith, like finding other Jewish singles.

Many people are fixed on the idea that compatibility means sharing a love for foreign films or caramel ice-cream. Couples do, of course, need activities to enjoy together, but one of the best things about being in a relationship is getting the opportunity to discover new things.

Relationships can open up our scope of interests, teach us new hobbies and challenge us to try new things. But no matter how different your interests might be, at the heart of every successful relationship there will be shared core attributes, attitudes and values.

How to find it

Finding compatible, like-minded singles doesn’t need to feel like a game of chance. Compatibility is a value at the heart of most quality online dating websites. Relationship sites like eHarmony CA specialize in bringing together people who have the potential to share meaningful and life-changing love.

….and here’s our latest post on SinglesWarehouse.com: Is It Dumb To Use A Smart Phone On A Date?

…and…and VOTE for us for Best Dating Book!


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