Posted by: Shar & Mare | June 28, 2010

Is He Boyfriend Material?


This week we have a guest-post, compliments of Marni Batista!

When it comes to finding long-lasting love, the men you want to typically date can be classified as Boyfriend Material. These men are also dating with dignity, and have an expressed interest in finding a partner who is confident, independent, and has the skills necessary to communicate in MANglish. The ability to understand and then respect MANglish is paramount to finding a relationship with Mr. Boyfriend Material. Why? The answer is, quite frankly, because Mr. Boyfriend Material won’t put up with your crap. He expects you to communicate your needs, have boundaries, express your expectations directly, and allow him to engage in activities that fulfill the essence of who he is. In addition, he knows that you won’t take everything he says as a personal rejection, or declaration of his love for you.

There are few key signs to look for to know if you are dating Mr. Boyfriend Material:

He is truly in a place where he feels confident and secure in his ability to provide. Men are most ready to be in an exclusive long-term relationship when they feel “settled.” They have spent time building their career and have the time available to invest in a relationship. A man who is capable of a long-term relationship has integrity, and as a result his words and actions match.

This is one of the most CRITICAL signs a man is ready to be your boyfriend. If his words and actions CONSISTENTLY match, it is clear he is ready to play in the big leagues – possibly with you. Mr. Boyfriend Material simply doesn’t play games. When he is interested in pursuing you, he will let you know in a way in which it is appropriate.

Mr. Boyfriend Material is attracted to a confident women who also dates in a world where games have no place. Mr. Boyfriend Material possesses an ability to express his feelings directly. He will not manipulate you with silence, criticize, or judge you. While it may seem obvious, Mr. Boyfriend Material is currently single. He is not in a relationship, “getting divorced,” or in a relationship with someone that just doesn’t seem to understand him like you do.

Mr. Boyfriend material does not expect you to have sex with him, AT ALL. In fact, many men who are truly looking for love are mature and wise enough to recognize that it is best to wait until he knows you better to pursue sexual intimacy.

In short, a man who is looking for a relationship is confident, mature, un-afraid to be vulnerable and feels comfortable with commitment. He will romance you willingly, and loves time spent together having tea, walking on the beach, or going to the movies. Sex is not his primary motive for calling or asking you out. Mr. Boyfriend Material is seeking an interdependent relationship with a woman who wants the same. Remember, he has “done that, been there, and will not be attracted to a woman who plays games, is manipulative or lacks confidence.

Thanks Marni, great advice to follow for those of us wanting to become Ms. Girlfriend!

Be sure to visit Marni at www.datingwithdignity.com

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Responses

  1. I love this advice! I’m going to have to keep this for when my girsl begin dating!

  2. This is a good post isn’t it. I don’t have a daughter but I might give it to my son with instructions to NEVER be these guys…happily though, he’s not…:)

  3. Wow, nice! Thanks for sharing! :-))

  4. […] This week we have a guest-post, compliments of Marni Batista! When it comes to finding long-lasting love, the men you want to typically date can be classified as Boyfriend Material. These men are also dating with dignity, and have an expressed interest in finding a partner who is confident, independent, and has the skills necessary to communicate in MANglish. The ability to understand and then respect MANglish is paramount to finding a relationsh … Read More […]

  5. I totally agree with the part about men who are serious boyfriend (and eventually husband) material as being the type of men who don’t play games. We try to explain to women all the time that men who are serious about a woman don’t play games, but I think some women mistake the arrogance of a game player for confidence. By the way, I love the term MANglish:)

  6. […] should i tell him im pregnant if im getting an abortion. You should maximize the use of your should relationship problems helpline i tell him im pregnant if im getting an […]


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