I am a democrat. I went out with a republican. This is OK, but all he wants to do is talk politics. He is cute and I like him and he does not argue with me … but I feel like I am being treated like the Quinnipiac poll … he keeps asking me my opinion about political issues. Some politics is fine, but not all the time.
I love politics. I love to debate politics. I am a news junkie. But, I do not go out on dates for political updates or debates. It can certainly be part of the conversation but should not dominate your conversation. It is a good sign that this person does not get angry or personal if you disagree with him. That shows respect and tolerance, which is great. He may be shy and political discussion could be his comfort zone and he may not even realize what he is doing. But, I would lead the conversation to other topics and see how he interacts. If he keeps bringing the conversation back to politics, just let him know that you enjoy the discussion, appreciate his acceptance of your opinions but you want to know more about HIM … his family, life, interests and aspirations as well. And prefer to broaden the topics of conversation. You can make your point nicely, tactfully and with humor. If over the next few dates he cannot comply, then you may want to move on. No one wants to feel like a Quinnipiac poll!
Wait. He’s a Republican and he didn’t argue with you….you…a Democrat? Oh, girlfriend this guy is either head-over-heels in love with you or he’s desperate to get you in bed. Hmmm, maybe a combination of both. Now, listen carefully, you are in a position of power here. You can, and should, introduce other topics of conversation. All politics all the time is a relationship crusher. Even Mariann (who was elected Prom Queen at her last Young Repubicans meeting) agrees with this. You can take the direct approach and just start chatting about anything non-political or, if he keeps steering you back to the latest Congressional gossip, you can be sneaky about it. You can say, for example, “OH YES…I totally believe in global warming. In fact I can feel it happening right NOW…I’m feeling so….warm” and start to remove items of clothing. Drastic yes, but it would certainly take his mind of the latest polls…:)
Sharon, why in almost every piece of advice you give you find some reason to remove articles of clothing? You are a naughty liberal, aren’t you? Republicans like to debate and Democrats like to argue and leave the room in a huff. OK. So, maybe that is my experience. Good that there is no arguing, but there is a life and a LOVE life beyond politics. As much as I love politics, talking about the new congress or campaign finance reform is NOT the way to my heart. This guy needs to step up and start courting you. If you want to test the waters, perhaps you should take some very controversial position and escalate the debate to see if you can get a rise out of him (and no naughty comments from you Sharon on that analogy) … now … maybe that will heat up the courtship and he will forget about what candidate he voted for in the last election.
Mariann, you little Fillibuster Queen, you do go on and on. OK, no naughty comments on the “get a rise out of him” freudian slip of yours….I’ll just let our saucy readers draw their own conclusions!
Are flowers too corny to bring to a girl? I have been out of the dating scene for so long and am just jumping back in … not sure what is corny or cool or not when taking out a girl … or going to her house for dinner. I welcome any suggestions.
Flowers are so CORNY..corny, corny, and more corn than an Iowa farm!! But oh so effective, leading to the conclusion that corny = good. The last man that I dated for any length of time brought me roses and lilacs on our first date. And let me just say that he was the only guy I’d met in years who did that. Did the flowers alone insure that I’d go out with him again? No, lots of things factor into that “chemistry” mystique, but they sure helped. Flowers on other dates are always welcome too. If you’re invited to her house for a home cooked meal bringing flowers (and maybe a bottle of wine or a sweet dessert) will pretty much insure that you’ll be staying for a night cap….and possibly breakfast the next day:)
Flowers are NOT corny. It has been 6 years since a man brought me flowers. Personally, I am allergic to strong flowers and they actually remind me of a funeral home so flowers are an appreciated thought but I would much prefer chocolate or champagne (it is about the bubbles afterall) … but something simple like a rose is perfect. Or one rose and one chocolate rose together. It is says that you are thoughtful and considerate. I think it is sweet and it is nice to be courted. You do not have to bring a gift for every date — that might make her uncomfortable. But, on a first date, a notable anniversary or an invitation to her house for dinner … then flowers, dessert, wine or even something cute that represents a funny moment or phrase you have are perfect. She will think it is charming. I agree with Sharon, it takes more than that to make it to a 2nd date or a long term relationship, but that can all factor into the chemistry that develops.