Posted by: Shar & Mare | September 5, 2011

The Black Hole of Dating Emails


Strange Emails!I found a great article on Match.com this week, Why Guys Don’t Bother to Call, which lists all the reasons men have for never calling you after a seemingly great first date where you have laughs, conversation and chemistry….Interesting…apparently grown men are prone to channeling their innner 16 year-old girls. I say this because I was a 16 year-old girl at one time. I over-analyzed ever word, gesture and shred of body-language produced by whichever boy I was currently “in crush” with. I had no interest in any boy who wasn’t rating high on the “cool” scale – much to my current self’s dismay at the last class reunion wherein the nerdy former classmate has turned out to be a talented, successful HUNK of a guy…Oh well.

Men will drop an apparently good match uncategorically because she has an annoying laugh or other odd quirk, seems to be interested in pursuing a serious relationship…OR pursuing a not serious relationship, and other real or imagined “reasons”. Of course, since I started dating online I’ve always suspected that this was the case. I’m pretty sure it works that way for the initial emails we send to one another before the coffee-or-drinks-or-dinner first meeting.

Last week I emailed someone who’s profile seemed interesting. He emailed me back with a compliment on my writing skills while including a few jokes about his own lack of such. He also wrote ” I can out cook most people and love to do crazy stuff. Jump from planes run with bulls and fish in the jungle. OK so now what do you think?” [sic]

Here’s part of what I sent back: “Do you jump from the plane before or after you run with bulls and fish….in the jungle?? LOL just kidding.” I can still hear the sound of crickets in the silence of my in-box. This was last week and I’m sure I’ll never hear from this guy again. Why? He’s still active on the site so he hasn’t met anyone else. I’m pretty sure I didn’t include any inadvertent comments which would lead him to believe I’m a nut/psycho/axe-murderer/high-maintenance/clingy/boring (worse than being an axe-murderer)/stalker/vegetarian, or ANY other possible deal breaker.

So, I’m going to believe that my somewhat sarcastic (but in the cutest way:) humor didn’t…um…let’s say resonate with him. And I’m fine with that. I want to meet the guy who bursts into gales of laughter when he reads some whacko comment that I’ve just written or uttered. I want to meet the guy who can throw me an appropriate comeback. I want to meet the guy who can go head-to-head with me in a sarcastic-comedic throwdown!

Know anyone like that? Send him my number, OK?

Sharon

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Responses

  1. It happens to the best of us. Aren’t you glad you are not all alone with these issues? Ha ha ha

  2. OH I certainly am!! This is why LifeBytes and the blog are so great…we can share our pain and have some laughs too.
    Sharon


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