Posted by: Shar & Mare | August 29, 2012

Email, Wink, Flirt…Don’t Wait, Go For It

I was flipping through some profiles on Match the other day and I was, surprisingly, excited to see a few guys who – based on their profiles – looked promising to me.

In the past when someone caught my eye I’d “favorite” them. This is Matches way of letting you bookmark profiles. My thinking was, I’d send a witty email when I had the time to write (and the inclination to be witty). Problem was, a lot of times I’d go back and some of the profiles I’d favorited would be gone, either hidden or removed. This usually sends me off into “what if” land. What if I missed a chance to meet someone great? What if one of the disappeared guys was my last chance at finding Mr Right? What if. What if. What if.

Of course I know that chances are only a very small percentage of these guys would have evolved into a single coffee date…let alone a series of dates….or, dare I say it…a relationship. But still, those missed connections do make one wonder.

So, my new tack is to do something…email, wink, anything. They may respond back, or not. The point is, if you don’t knock on the door then it’s guaranteed that no one will answer. If I put the simple “hi, how are you” message out there though, someone will answer. Also, I won’t be wondering “what if”. If I send a message and he doesn’t respond I’ll know he wasn’t interested in getting to know me. If he does respond, well…it could very well be the start of something big.


Check out our latest article “Your Must Haves…Pick Three” on Singles Warehouse! And while you’re there be sure to read posts from some of the other fine SWEXPERTS.



  1. Definitely agree on having to act fast. If someone stays on a dating site for a very long time, there’s usually a reason for it. Maybe they’re players, maybe they’re extremely picky, maybe something isn’t quite what it seems… the nice ones are just the first ones to leave.

    It’s also one of the reasons why some sites even show you the most recently joined members (if you’re willing to pay for a higher premium subscription level that is).

  2. […] Admit it, you think it’s hard to flirt online and yet, most of us know how to flirt in real life. Even those who swear that they’re terrible flirts will start batting their eyes and flipping their hair when they meet someone to whom they’re wildly attracted. We’ll coyly laugh at someone’s jokes (even if their not in the least bit funny) and we’ll make silly flirty comments as part of the human mating ritual. Whether we realize it or not, flirting is in our DNA. […]

  3. […] My subscription isn’t about to expire – because I have noticed in the past that there’s an uptick in responses when I’m about to be asked to pony-up my credit card info again. (Clever, very […]

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