Posted by: Shar & Mare | February 14, 2011

Be Your Own Valentine

It’s Valentine’s Day and no one is showing up at your door tonight with roses and Godiva’s in hand and you will not be carried off to a candlelit dinner at your favorite bistro. What do you do when the entire (or so it seems to you) world is kissing and cuddling and you’re home. Alone. Totally. Alone.

Yes, deep down we all know it’s a made up holiday. Just another excuse for Hallmark, Godiva, Victoria’s Secret and the little bakery down on the corner – you know the one that makes the awesome cupcakes – to improve their bottom lines for the fiscal quarter. Still, there’s something about having a special “faux holiday” dedicated to letting someone know that they’re loved. And here we are spending VeeDay alone.

This would lead one to believe that the only choices are: Cry, drink lots of wine and cry, nuke a Lean Cuisine meal and then cry, watch Sleepless In Seattle for the eight-hundredth time…and have a good cry. …..OR…. you can just be your own Valentine. Yes…you. What makes Valentine’s Day so much fun is being just a bit pampered by someone who cares. And who cares about you more than you? So show yourself the love, smile – a smile is a powerful thing and can lift your spirits, lower your blood pressure and just make you….happy. So how do you get smiley and happy, when all you really want to do is bury your face in a bucket of ice cream and then eat your way out of it? Like this:

Stop and smell the roses. Buy yourself a bunch of the prettiest flowers, and while you’re at it throw in a box of chocolates. When you do this for yourself you can be absolutely sure that you will be getting your favorite flowers and candy. Don’t like chocolate? Get gummi bears, or whatever your heart desires. After all who knows what you like better than you do yourself?

Put on your fleeciest PJs and hog the TV all night. Watch all the movies that you and no one else but you loves. Watch the entire set of Die Hard movies ad nauseum because YOU like em, dammit! It’s all about you tonight baby!!

Call your unattached friends and have a “Lonely Hearts” dinner. I did this once years ago. I had just been through a bad breakup and wanted nothing more than to curl up in a ball and die for Valentine’s Day. My friends had other plans for me though. My buddy Rob brought heart stickers for us. Made us tear them in half and paste our “broken hearts” on our lapels. Five of us then went out to dinner wearing our badges and I have to tell you – this was one of the best nights out I’ve ever had. I really can’t say that I’ve ever laughed more than I did that VeeDay….and I usually laugh a lot.

Pay the love forward. Show the world you care by making a donation to your favorite charity. Give blood or take a CPR class. What better way to pay the love forward than by possibly saving a life. You could also save the sanity of your married-with-children friends by offering to baby sit on Valentine’s Day so they can go out and celebrate. Best part of this is, they can repay you by house- or dog-sitting for you when you DO have a new love in your life and you’re headed to the Bahamas for a romantic weekend!

So, how are you going to be your own Valentine this year? The phone lines are open…

I Heart You All,



  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Larissa Symbouras, Sharon & Mariann. Sharon & Mariann said: On the #blog today: Be Your Own Valentine […]

  2. Holidays… Who the heck thought them up? They are for the people with the perfect families and perfect lives. The holidays are built around that type of life and if you don’t have it – if you’re an elderly widowed person, if you’re in your 30s or 40s and still single after all these years, if you’re divorced… It usually brings up so many difficult emotions.

    That’s why I’m happy I live in a country and in a religion where Valentines goes by with barely a whisper. At some point at work today someone said, “Oh, it’s Valentines.”

    That was it.

    So yes, you can celebrate Valentines by commemorating it alone or you can let it whisper hello as it rushes by.

    (Of course my country/religion has a million other holidays instead, but that’s a whole other story.:)

    P.S. I actually don’t believe that holidays are for people with perfect lives. I think they are for people who can find it in their hearts to enjoy them no matter what their life situations are. It is a huge challenge but very gratifying to succeed in enjoying them even if there are things that are difficult about your life.

    And, of course, that isn’t to ask: Who the heck has a perfect life?!

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