1. I don’t have a headshot posted because I’m very famous in my town. (Um, OK. Town drunk? Married? Really a woman?)
2. I’m married but maybe you could just have some fun with me till your Prince Charming comes along. (Soooooo…you’re being honest with me but NOT your wife?)
3. Make a wish and I’ll grant it. (After you pop out of a bottle wearing bloomers?)
4. I read your email as I was sipping a Mocha Latte, while enjoying the jasmine scents of the foliage as it wafted through my kitchen window. (This was oddly flowery for a guy…. until I found out that he’d sent the SAME email to my girlfriend..verbatim- then it was just weird. And BTW, what “wafted”, the scents or the foliage?)
5. i looking for a women just lik you. (Thank you for the warning).
6. 300-555-2788 (“CALL NOW to take advantage of this limited time offer!!!!” ???).
7. I would like to meet you later today for an afternoon of sexual pleasures. (Today? Gee, how about….NEVER.)
8. (This one came after I’d sent a polite “no thank you” to someone who emailed me) “Well, I hope you find your prince…under the TREE!” (My Christmas tree or the oak tree in my backyard? Quick, let me know I want to go and look!)
9. Here’s a link to the Real Estate group that handles the rental on my shore house. You can see a picture of the house on their site! (I’m looking for a date, not a vacation rental…just sayin’)
10. If we meet you’ll need to know that I am an atheist! (Afraid I’ll scream “Praise the Lord and pass the potatoes!!!” before we have dinner?)
Amen – thank you God for gifting me with a fairly healthy sense of humor..) What’s the oddest email comment you’ve ever gotten?